Ballz 3D (Mega Drive Review)

arcadeattackReviews - Mega Drive1 Comment

What on earth is a brouhaha fight??? Answers on a postcard please

What on earth is a brouhaha fight??? Answers on a postcard please

PL Design had to give it a go.  There are so many software houses, the smaller ones need to do something different in order to get known.  Accolade should have known better but have decided to take a punt on Ballz 3D, a “3D” one on one fighting game.  Other games have tried to offer the 360 degree, multi-layer fighting experience (Muhammad Ali Boxing and Fatal Fury spring to mind) but PL Design have gone even further.  Or have tried to at least.

 

The box indicates it may be a cool puzzle game or maybe a platform game with vast colourful levels, and after about five minutes of playing this game you’re wishing they’d have done something else.  Standard tournament fare here, but the characters are all made of, wait for it, balls!  I’ll be honest, some of the characters here look great, the clown and the prehistoric man (right) are two good examples. The balls have a 3D-ish feel to them but the shading of them is lazy.  Whether this is down to the capability of the 16-bit, I’m not sure.

 

Where was the pork? He didn’t mean THAT surely?

Where was the pork? He didn’t mean THAT surely?

The “arenas” (I’ve got to be careful with my use of speech marks here) all look the same, the floors are usually one colour scaled gradually down to black. Massive TV screens display silly pictures and ludicrous innuendo (the screenshots only cover a small proportion).  The reason for this?  Awful gameplay. The characters are unresponsive, it’s nigh on impossible to string any kind of satisfying combo together.  You end up mashing the buttons and some fights can be over in ten seconds provided you get your opponent in a headlock.  The arena spins around you when moving away from your foe, making it impossible to know what direction to press in order to land a punch, or a kick, or a whole tirade of balls on him!

 

I have no words...

I have no words…

Fights are dull and predictable, even the slightly more interesting boss fights fail to inject anything noteworthy.  The sound effects are bloodcurdling, when you’re beating up a clown, you KNOW you’re beating up a clown, the less said about the female characters the better.

 

For the love of god please do not inflict this game on anyone, you can pay for the counselling if you do.

 

Ballz-mega-drive-review

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